Long Time, No See

I am woefully behind in my blogging, but for a very good reason. Owen keeps us pretty busy these days. He is growing like a weed and we're thinking he may be about 12pds already. He goes for his next well baby check up in a week, so we'll know for sure then. His silent reflux seems to be getting better, and the nutramigen formula has really helped a lot. We think he is allergic to milk protein. He never did get the hang of breastfeeding which really dissapointed me, but as long as he gets what he needs I'm happy. Meanwhile, we've started collecting preemie clothes to donate to the hospital where Owen was in the NICU. I plan to take the donations on September 11th as a positive thing to do that in day in memory of so much tragedy. You can find the clothing drive on facebook at "Little O's Preemie Clothes" (Owen's best nurse, Christina, used to call him her Little O).

Lately, I spend more time writing in my grief blog, Searching for Jack, I think because having Owen has brought back so many emotions. I think those feelings are always there, but were amplified by actually seeing what we missed out on. It's very complex when you have a baby after loss. So much of you wants to be happy, but there is still a very big hole in your heart. And at times, you stare at the child in front of you and you know in your heart that his brother should be sitting next to him. Poking at him, trying to wake him up.

I've been asked a couple of times if we'll have anymore children and thinking on it I can honestly say I have no idea. It took a lot of medical care, bedrest, family support and help to get Owen here and I don't know if we'll ever have that kind of situation again. I hope so, but it will be something that takes a lot of thought and planning. Not to mention, I'd like to take a few years off to get rid of some of this weight I'm lugging around. I'm beginning to feel like Jabba the Hut (with an even bigger butt! lol!).

So that's a little update on our lives right now, again sorry for not posting more. And thank you, as always, for continuing to read. :)